It’s been almost two weeks since La Vida. Those lovely days now feel like a dream (did the wonderfulness even occur?). In these almost two weeks, I got to reunite with a dear bosom friend who I have not seen in five months (she was over in the Philippines studying under midwives in a birthing home), I learned that my car had broken down (which it has just recently gotten fixed – thank God! – and was fortunately not as bad of a problem as we had thought), and I had also learned that I was going to have trouble securing an outside loan for school.
Transition is, well, transition. It’s crazy what 12 days out in the wilderness can do to a girl. The simplicity of that life, it was luscious. By day three of coming back, I was already running around again trying to get things done. It feels like everything that was awaken in me, that was established in my life, that I had learned during La Vida, is now being tested.
I feel SO ready for Gordon, for this new season in my life. Sadly it just feels like my circumstances are trying to fight that. With my current situation, I will not be able to dorm at Gordon this year. I think I have envisioned this new life at college so vividly in a dorm, that the thought of not dorming is rather hard – it’s almost as though I’m morning a “lost.” Not quite sure how reasonable that emotion is, or how pathetic.
God is Sovereign though. Those “who see the Lord lack no good thing” (Psalm 34:10). Whatever happens will be GOOD. Right now, it’s just hard to see that.
I will be commuting back and forth to Gordon while living with my mom (who lives a tad bit more than 30 minutes from the college). My heart has been missing my mom dearly, so I’m looking forward to living with her. But my heart that is also yearning for new independence, well, I think you all get the picture.
Romans 15:13
“May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in Him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.”
It’s time to trust in God, to hope in Him. There is a verse in a song that goes “Sovereign, you are still sovereign, even when my circumstances don’t change.” It is a true reality, but a hard one. But my soul rests in the one whose “presence goes with me and gives me rest” (Exodus 33:14).
I don’t want to give in to anxiety, fear, worry, doubt, and depression. No. That is not a choice I want to make. I have had to make a lot of choices within the past few months, and to give in to the negative will NOT be one of them. No.
I choose joy.
Showing posts with label Gordon. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Gordon. Show all posts
Thursday, July 15, 2010
Monday, July 12, 2010
La Vida - The Life (part 3)
Day 9 and 10 – SOLO
As part of our “final” for La Vida, we are required to do a solo. Basically, for two days we are on our own in the woods and during that time we do a fast from food. The night before solo, we as a group decided to have a vow of silence during the morning of solo and the morning when we would return. We would end the silence with a song of worship.
Getting up that morning, we all packed up our things – in silence – and soon enough were led away from camp. When we were about 100 yards or so away from camp (close enough that our leaders could get to us in case of an emergency and such), I was led to my spot. The group continued on, leaving me to start looking for a spot for my solo tarp. For the first few minutes I found myself wandering in circles trying to find a good clearing where I would leave my gear and sleep for the next two nights. Once I finally discovered a good spot, I got everything set up and am pleased to say, I set up quite a lovely solo tarp.
When all of that was said and done, it was time to explore. We were only allowed to stay within a certain distance of our solo camp, but were permitted to go down to the water – thank God! Down near the water, I was blessed with the perfect spot. A nice birch tree that had a thick branch hanging low to ground provided me with my sitting spot.
The mornings of solo were easier than the nights. The second day was overall easier than the first. Each day I wrote in my La Vida journal, prayed, read my Bible, memorized scripture, and worshiped. I craved GORP (Good Ole Raisins and Peanuts) as well as other yummy foods, there were moments that I was rather tired, and at some moments I found myself at a loss of what I wanted to do. Fasting out in the wilderness is much different than fasting in the comfort of your home where you have more things to do to keep you occupied (like reading a book). Besides the struggles that I meet over those two days, I also had some wonderful moments that triumphed over them. To sit on a tree, look out over the lake, and talk to Jesus, it’s a special thing. He brought me through things over that time. I ended that solo all the more excited for Gordon.
Day 11 – The last bag of GORP
Getting up that morning, taking down my solo camp, and walking back to the campsite with the rest of the girls (we would meet the boys at the campsite) was rather hard. We were all lightheaded and tired.
When we all meet up together and sat around the campfire, we each placed a natural object (a leaf, rock, a stick, etc) in the middle and said something about our solo time. After we sung our song, chatter broke loose and we over a nice breakfast of soup, shared our experience.
Camp was taken down, things were packed, canoes were loaded, and we embarked on our quickest canoe voyage. After pulling in, we found ourselves along a road. As we waited for the van to come and pick us up along with the canoes, we sat in a circle, dined on our last bag of GORP, and shared our ACE’s with another (Appreciations and Challenges/Exhortations). Arriving back to base camp was interesting, eleven days ago we had all started out there, to be back and to see how different we all were as individuals and as a group, it was awesome!
Getting some logistics dealt with (returning some gear, setting up the campsite where we all start out at, practicing a skit), we eventually got to do what we were all looking forward to, eat some FOOD food, and this wasn’t just in our group of twelve, but with all the canoe and hiking groups – the reunion was lovely. Walking into the room where we were to get our food, all the Sherpas served us – the room was CHAOTIC but WONDERFUL, Sherpas screaming at students if they wanted a burger or a hot dog, barbecue chips or Doritos. Another fun memory was when all the Sherpas came running at us with buckets of ice cream, and we all wondered, were they going to throw it at us or give it to us to eat? It turned out to be the later; though I’m sure a food fight would have been rather delightful.
After some down time, though for our group it was more active time (we were playing soccer and throwing a Frisbee), we all gathered in the barn for worship, skits, and testimonies. Worship was delightful, our skit went pretty well, and the testimonies were encouraging.
The night was the first time the whole twelve of us slept under the group tarp. We all decided as a group that if we had done that every night, we would have never slept. That night as we finally went to bed, many things went through my mind. It was our last night. The next day we would be leaving. Also, the following morning would hold our last physical challenge – an 8 mile run.
Day 12 – A heartfelt goodbye
As part of our “final” for La Vida, we are required to do a solo. Basically, for two days we are on our own in the woods and during that time we do a fast from food. The night before solo, we as a group decided to have a vow of silence during the morning of solo and the morning when we would return. We would end the silence with a song of worship.
Getting up that morning, we all packed up our things – in silence – and soon enough were led away from camp. When we were about 100 yards or so away from camp (close enough that our leaders could get to us in case of an emergency and such), I was led to my spot. The group continued on, leaving me to start looking for a spot for my solo tarp. For the first few minutes I found myself wandering in circles trying to find a good clearing where I would leave my gear and sleep for the next two nights. Once I finally discovered a good spot, I got everything set up and am pleased to say, I set up quite a lovely solo tarp.
When all of that was said and done, it was time to explore. We were only allowed to stay within a certain distance of our solo camp, but were permitted to go down to the water – thank God! Down near the water, I was blessed with the perfect spot. A nice birch tree that had a thick branch hanging low to ground provided me with my sitting spot.
The mornings of solo were easier than the nights. The second day was overall easier than the first. Each day I wrote in my La Vida journal, prayed, read my Bible, memorized scripture, and worshiped. I craved GORP (Good Ole Raisins and Peanuts) as well as other yummy foods, there were moments that I was rather tired, and at some moments I found myself at a loss of what I wanted to do. Fasting out in the wilderness is much different than fasting in the comfort of your home where you have more things to do to keep you occupied (like reading a book). Besides the struggles that I meet over those two days, I also had some wonderful moments that triumphed over them. To sit on a tree, look out over the lake, and talk to Jesus, it’s a special thing. He brought me through things over that time. I ended that solo all the more excited for Gordon.
Day 11 – The last bag of GORP
Getting up that morning, taking down my solo camp, and walking back to the campsite with the rest of the girls (we would meet the boys at the campsite) was rather hard. We were all lightheaded and tired.
When we all meet up together and sat around the campfire, we each placed a natural object (a leaf, rock, a stick, etc) in the middle and said something about our solo time. After we sung our song, chatter broke loose and we over a nice breakfast of soup, shared our experience.
Camp was taken down, things were packed, canoes were loaded, and we embarked on our quickest canoe voyage. After pulling in, we found ourselves along a road. As we waited for the van to come and pick us up along with the canoes, we sat in a circle, dined on our last bag of GORP, and shared our ACE’s with another (Appreciations and Challenges/Exhortations). Arriving back to base camp was interesting, eleven days ago we had all started out there, to be back and to see how different we all were as individuals and as a group, it was awesome!
Getting some logistics dealt with (returning some gear, setting up the campsite where we all start out at, practicing a skit), we eventually got to do what we were all looking forward to, eat some FOOD food, and this wasn’t just in our group of twelve, but with all the canoe and hiking groups – the reunion was lovely. Walking into the room where we were to get our food, all the Sherpas served us – the room was CHAOTIC but WONDERFUL, Sherpas screaming at students if they wanted a burger or a hot dog, barbecue chips or Doritos. Another fun memory was when all the Sherpas came running at us with buckets of ice cream, and we all wondered, were they going to throw it at us or give it to us to eat? It turned out to be the later; though I’m sure a food fight would have been rather delightful.
After some down time, though for our group it was more active time (we were playing soccer and throwing a Frisbee), we all gathered in the barn for worship, skits, and testimonies. Worship was delightful, our skit went pretty well, and the testimonies were encouraging.
The night was the first time the whole twelve of us slept under the group tarp. We all decided as a group that if we had done that every night, we would have never slept. That night as we finally went to bed, many things went through my mind. It was our last night. The next day we would be leaving. Also, the following morning would hold our last physical challenge – an 8 mile run.
Day 12 – A heartfelt goodbye
That morning we had a nice light breakfast to fuel us as we would being running soon. A nice thing about all the challenges that we had (low ropes, rock climbing…) was that they are considered a “challenge by choice.” I knew I could not run the whole 8 miles, physically my body couldn’t do that; however, to walk and jog it, that’s a different story. And that was what I did.
After picking a spot, like a mail box, a sign, or a house, I would then jog to that spot. Two hours and about twenty minutes later, I had jogged and walked back to base camp. Praise Jesus! There were moments along the jog/walk that I felt like the Lord was placing this on my heart: “You have turned to others for answers, for support, now it’s time to turn to me for the solutions to your problems, to be your support. Let me carry you.”
After we had finished gather all our things together, had lunch, exchanged info to one another, it was time to board the vans and go home. Our Sherpas, Steven and Sarah, were incredible – wouldn’t trade them for nothing. They encouraged, motivated, challenged, and supported us. They were patient with us and listened to us. They modeled servant leadership. It’s been more than week since La Vida ended, and I miss them already.
The van provided a good means to transition back to the world, especially when those who were controlling the radio kept letting it play Lady Gaga. Soon we halfway there, and then, we were back at Gordon. Photos were taken, loving words were exchanged, and hugs were given.
I hopped into my mom’s car and we drove back to her apartment where I got to take a delicious shower and sleep on a bed (aw, the luxury).
The physical experience of La Vida had ended, but La Vida continues through my life. The lessons I have learned go with me now throughout my days. Now, my heart is at ease knowing that I have friends waiting for me on the day orientation begins. Friends who will support and encourage me. The trip has given me a closer relationship with Jesus and has given me who I consider my La Vida family - to you lovely people, I love you all!
I could go on and on about La Vida, and there are still so many stories to share, but for now, everyone can at least have a small idea of what went on during that beautiful time.
After we had finished gather all our things together, had lunch, exchanged info to one another, it was time to board the vans and go home. Our Sherpas, Steven and Sarah, were incredible – wouldn’t trade them for nothing. They encouraged, motivated, challenged, and supported us. They were patient with us and listened to us. They modeled servant leadership. It’s been more than week since La Vida ended, and I miss them already.
The van provided a good means to transition back to the world, especially when those who were controlling the radio kept letting it play Lady Gaga. Soon we halfway there, and then, we were back at Gordon. Photos were taken, loving words were exchanged, and hugs were given.
I hopped into my mom’s car and we drove back to her apartment where I got to take a delicious shower and sleep on a bed (aw, the luxury).
The physical experience of La Vida had ended, but La Vida continues through my life. The lessons I have learned go with me now throughout my days. Now, my heart is at ease knowing that I have friends waiting for me on the day orientation begins. Friends who will support and encourage me. The trip has given me a closer relationship with Jesus and has given me who I consider my La Vida family - to you lovely people, I love you all!
I could go on and on about La Vida, and there are still so many stories to share, but for now, everyone can at least have a small idea of what went on during that beautiful time.
Choose Joy!
Thursday, July 8, 2010
La Vida - The Life (part 2)
Day 3 – Up in the Air
Three words: high ropes course. Imagine it. You come to a clearing. Trees that are rather high loom before you. One “course” consists of a rope incline, with two other ropes on each side (to be used to help pull you up). Another course, called the Indiana Jones Bridge, is made up of, you guessed it, a bridge that one must balance across. Four more small courses follow these two and make up what is considered the La Vida’s high ropes course. It was you, a harness, someone below who is connected to the harness, your balance, and Jesus.
This was where I found myself on the morning of Day 3. Of course, it was also raining. Praise God, the weather had let up some when it came to my turn to attempt the course.
Going up the first course – the incline – was especially hard. Encouragement from below motivated me to push. To my amazement, I did it! The next three small courses went by with a breeze. The whole time I was in utter disbelief. I was actually doing this! I came to a small platform where I got to rest for a few minutes and was required to either, sing a song, do a dance, or make a joke. I went for the lovely song and dance combo and sang “Don’t Stop Believing” (the Glee version).
The next course that loomed ahead of me was considered the rope vines course. Besides a small wire my feet had to balance and cross on, rope vines were spaced nicely apart to be what my hands could cling to for support. Halfway through, due to slipperiness of the wire rope I’m sure, I slipped. There I hung, clinging to one of the vines with one hand, and the wire rope with the other. More encouragement from down below shouted that I could do it, that I just had to pull myself up.
Those who know me can agree that I am not strong by any means, especially when it comes to upper body strength. It seemed I had no choice but to let go and have them lower me back down. But something came. Motivation? Determination? Inspiration? Sure! I pushed my muscles and surprisingly pulled myself up. A few more steps and I of course slipped once more. However, getting back up that time was easier. I came to the last course, crossed the log, and was then lowered to the ground in great victory. Thank the Lord, I had done it.
Later on, we packed up a van, loaded up the canoes, and we finally, to the groups greatest delight, set off. The trip began with a portage – when you carry the canoes overhead so to cross land. Down the first hill I recall slipping (it must have become a new habit for the day) and falling with the canoe upon me – it was rather brilliant on my end. The portage was small and I was able to manage it.
This was where I found myself on the morning of Day 3. Of course, it was also raining. Praise God, the weather had let up some when it came to my turn to attempt the course.
Going up the first course – the incline – was especially hard. Encouragement from below motivated me to push. To my amazement, I did it! The next three small courses went by with a breeze. The whole time I was in utter disbelief. I was actually doing this! I came to a small platform where I got to rest for a few minutes and was required to either, sing a song, do a dance, or make a joke. I went for the lovely song and dance combo and sang “Don’t Stop Believing” (the Glee version).
The next course that loomed ahead of me was considered the rope vines course. Besides a small wire my feet had to balance and cross on, rope vines were spaced nicely apart to be what my hands could cling to for support. Halfway through, due to slipperiness of the wire rope I’m sure, I slipped. There I hung, clinging to one of the vines with one hand, and the wire rope with the other. More encouragement from down below shouted that I could do it, that I just had to pull myself up.
Those who know me can agree that I am not strong by any means, especially when it comes to upper body strength. It seemed I had no choice but to let go and have them lower me back down. But something came. Motivation? Determination? Inspiration? Sure! I pushed my muscles and surprisingly pulled myself up. A few more steps and I of course slipped once more. However, getting back up that time was easier. I came to the last course, crossed the log, and was then lowered to the ground in great victory. Thank the Lord, I had done it.
Later on, we packed up a van, loaded up the canoes, and we finally, to the groups greatest delight, set off. The trip began with a portage – when you carry the canoes overhead so to cross land. Down the first hill I recall slipping (it must have become a new habit for the day) and falling with the canoe upon me – it was rather brilliant on my end. The portage was small and I was able to manage it.
Soon, we had hit water. After returning to our starting point near the van once more to collect gear we made our way back to the water which we all had yearned to reach. It was time to canoe! I got in the front of the canoe with one our Sherpas – Steven. Once everyone was loaded up, gear and all, two to a canoe, we took off. How exhilarating! The first trip didn’t last long and we soon had to pull in due to the fact that if we continued down the river any further we would have hit some small rapids. Unloading, we began another portage. This one I didn’t have to carry a canoe, so I took a bag and followed. Once we got to camp, we had to turn around once more and go retrieve our bags (this is how all the portages were set up).
Our camp consisted of a nice lean-to, and we were fortunate, there was an outhouse. That night, we learned how to set up a bear bag (where you put food in a sturdy stuff sack and hang it up in a tree in a way that a bear cannot attack it), strangely enough it wasn’t a bear that ever attacked our food during the trip, but chipmunks. We also learned how to broadcast – it’s when after your brush your teeth, you do not merely just spit the toothpaste out in one spot, but spray it out all around. It was hard not to broadcast the first time without fits of laughter.
All cozy in the lean-to, boys one side and girls on the other, we reflected on the day. That day I got a clear example of endurance from the ropes course. Sometimes in trials, it seems the only option we have is to give in. But, you can always pull yourself up and finish with victory (more on this lesson later).
Our camp consisted of a nice lean-to, and we were fortunate, there was an outhouse. That night, we learned how to set up a bear bag (where you put food in a sturdy stuff sack and hang it up in a tree in a way that a bear cannot attack it), strangely enough it wasn’t a bear that ever attacked our food during the trip, but chipmunks. We also learned how to broadcast – it’s when after your brush your teeth, you do not merely just spit the toothpaste out in one spot, but spray it out all around. It was hard not to broadcast the first time without fits of laughter.
All cozy in the lean-to, boys one side and girls on the other, we reflected on the day. That day I got a clear example of endurance from the ropes course. Sometimes in trials, it seems the only option we have is to give in. But, you can always pull yourself up and finish with victory (more on this lesson later).
Day 4 to Day 8 - The Wonderfulness in Between
The next following days generally went along the lines of this: We would get up, pack up most of our stuff and go about doing our morning duties (bring down the bear bags, take down the tents and group tarp, filter water and fill up water bottles, or make breakfast). Then our Sherpa, Sarah, would lead us into a small lesson which was followed with us going off on our own for some devotion time (a time to sit at the base of a tree, or on a rock by the water and write in our journals, worship, and pray to God).
Group Tarp
Next, it would be time to load up the canoes, get with your canoe buddy (we switched every day), and then as a group we would gather the canoes together out on the water and pray. And off we went! We canoed a lot each day (my guess at least 3 hours a day). We usually stopped once in between for snack, lunch, and/or bathroom break. At the end of each canoe voyage, we would then portage the canoes and gear to our campsite. This usually occurred after lunchtime. Once we get to camp, it’s time to set up the tents, tarp, get out things for dinner, filter more water, take care of bear bags, and fellowship with one another during it all. We would end the day with a life story or two (when one of us students would share basically a 15-20 minute testimony which followed with the rest of the group asking the student various questions whether serious or silly and then it would end for us praying for that student), some prayer, and worship. It was a blissful time!
Our Canoes
Each day we would have our LOD’s (Leaders of the Day). Two or three (depending on the day) of us would be the “Sherpas” for the day. We would be in charge of getting everyone up, making sure tasks were done, making sure everyone stuck to the map route, encouraging all, etc.
One of our Campsites
Throughout those days songs were sung out on the canoes, sometimes a little to loudly that we had to contain ourselves to not to disturb other canoers or kayakers who would pass us. Laughter was a common occurrence throughout the hours and minutes. Encouragement was just as frequent. Life was shared.
We would get caught in the rain, so we did all that we could do, we’d put on our rain jackets and embrace the weather (I remember on Day 8 – our “Final” – we got poured on out on the canoes. We didn’t complain, no, instead we shouted with glee, and welcomed the weather and challenge that it presented to us). Support was exchange during portaging. We learned to trust each other enough to be vulnerable and admit when we needed help. Friendships were made; a family was created.
I could go into detail of all the wonderful moments, but that would probably take about a books worth of writing. Just know, each moment was a treasure and it’s print will be forever in my memory and forever in my heart.
Tuesday, June 15, 2010
LA VIDA!!!
I'm going!
Deposit has been deposited
Ticket has been booked
Forms faxed
Clothes...well, still working on that one
But the main thing is...I'M GOING!
For a while, I didn't think it was going to happen. And, I'll fess up, at moments I didn't have faith that it will be taken care of (sorry about that Jesus). However, God is gracious and He loves me! So far, everything - including the bumps and obstacles - has been working out beautifully.
This upcoming Sunday I will be hopping aboard good ole Jet Blue and flying to Massachusetts. That Tuesday, I will be traveling to the Adirondack (I have yet to say that word correctly...) Mountains in upstate New York, where my wilderness adventure will start! Twelve days later I will arrive back to Massachusetts, with hair with an elevation that is astronomical (and don't get me started on what I will probably be smelling like), skin that's hopefully nicely tanned, and mainly, friendships that have been created and a relationship with Jesus that has been deepened. I'm itching with excitement to start!
Deposit has been deposited
Ticket has been booked
Forms faxed
Clothes...well, still working on that one
But the main thing is...I'M GOING!
For a while, I didn't think it was going to happen. And, I'll fess up, at moments I didn't have faith that it will be taken care of (sorry about that Jesus). However, God is gracious and He loves me! So far, everything - including the bumps and obstacles - has been working out beautifully.
This upcoming Sunday I will be hopping aboard good ole Jet Blue and flying to Massachusetts. That Tuesday, I will be traveling to the Adirondack (I have yet to say that word correctly...) Mountains in upstate New York, where my wilderness adventure will start! Twelve days later I will arrive back to Massachusetts, with hair with an elevation that is astronomical (and don't get me started on what I will probably be smelling like), skin that's hopefully nicely tanned, and mainly, friendships that have been created and a relationship with Jesus that has been deepened. I'm itching with excitement to start!
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